In Mom Life on
March 26, 2015

I’m sorry for all the things I said, before I was a Mom

We’ve all done it, made a mental list of the countless things “I will NEVER do as a MOM”
Shoot, mine is probably the size of a short novel. Before I had my daughter I would see “those moms” and think OMG my kid would never get away with that!

We all have friends with kids, nieces or nephews, we’ve been to kids birthday parties and we sit there watching them with our glaring eyes, thinking my child will never act like that. I’ve seen that 2 year old that is throwing themselves on the ground, in target distraught over wanting a new toy. I’ve witnessed that mom in a restaurant who lets her kid play LOUDLY on her iPhone while throwing food, so she can have a peaceful “adult conversation”.  I’ve seen that toddler who’s got food all over their t-shirt and mismatched socks, with messy hair. Well let me tell ya friends, be a parent for just one day {or just one hour} and your tune will change.

I have a 7 month old baby, and I cannot tell you just how exhausting/rewarding being a mom is.
I love my daughter, she is hands down the best thing that has ever happened to me, BUT the lack of sleep, countless loads of laundry and the dried baby food that I find in every crease of our house,  can be overwhelming at times.

We went on a family vacation last week. On our way home, what was suppose to be an 8 hour drive turned into a 13 hour car ride, that ended in us getting home around midnight. Thirteen hours in the car is ALOT, but 13 hours in the car with a baby?! O man, it was tough. Annabelle did really good, but she honestly just wanted to crawl around and get out of the car. I had major mom guilt having her strapped in the carseat for that long. Sure we stopped along the way and let her take breaks at rest areas but lets be honest 5 minutes of freedom is just not enough to a little one.

So heres my aha “maybe you shouldn’t judge other moms” moment- after spending the day before vacation preparing all my daughters “healthy” homemade organic baby foods, she did not want them! NOT any of them the entire car ride home! She kept playing this “spitting” game every time I would feed her the baby food. Didn’t she know I was giving her the “very best”. That I had prepared and was just looking out for her best interest? I am still nursing so I tried to nurse her to get her full, but NOPE she wanted real food. So at 9:00PM with still 3 hours to go, my husband and I made a decision, {a parenting decision that I said I would NEVER do} we pulled into KFC and gave our BABY mashed potatoes and macaroni and cheese.

sad_face
Here I am a lifestyle and fitness blogger and I gave my daughter mashed potatoes from a fast food joint! This is so silly, I realize that. But it is just one of the many examples of instances where I did something, that I had previously judged other moms for. But here’s the deal. As a parent, you do what you gotta do! You pick your battles and you make the best decision you can in each moment.And that is something I never understood before becoming a mom. It is so easy to “judge” and say what you would do in each moment. But when you are running on exhaustion, you have tried 59 other solutions and nothing is working, maybe you would give your kid that fast food, or piece of chocolate, or give them your iPad for just one moment of peace.

I say all of this to not complain about motherhood at all. It is AMAZING and will always be the most important priority of my life. But I say all of this to apologize to all those moms out there who I naively judged. Motherhood is intense, it is different than I imagined and it is so unique for every mother and child. Most days my baby is not wearing shoes, still has this mornings sweet potato in her hair and I rock my workout pants ALL day long! Being a mom is not a fairytale story, it’s hard work, sleepless nights, it is putting this small childs needs before your own. And most of all motherhood is an amazing gift.

So next time I see that screaming toddler throwing a tantrum at Target, I’m guna glare a little less and smile a little more and say “Its okay, I’ve been there, you’re doing great Momma!”

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4 Comments

  • Shelly

    YES! It is safe to assume that less judging in all areas of our lives would be better. You just don’t EVER know the back story, whether it be with babies or bodies. Love more, smile at, hug and pray for each other… This life thing, with or without babies, is tough! Love it, Alesha! God bless your every moment!

    March 26, 2015 at 9:46 am Reply
    • alesha_haley@yahoo.com

      SO true Shelly!! Exactly, you never know what someone else is going through 🙂 More love and less judging!

      March 26, 2015 at 11:15 am Reply
  • Molly

    So true! I remember one time being sick, and I work full time from home, so I’d had a full day of work, feeling terrible, and dealing with a busy toddler, and I just wanted to get him into bed – so I let him have chocolate chips for dinner. He didn’t want to eat anything, and I was too worn out to care. Haha! He survived. Now I have 2 and I laugh, thinking that I have myself so much more together, that would never happen again, but in reality, I can’t guarantee it! Even my baby basically refuses all healthy food, all the time. The only things he’ll eat willingly are goldfish crackers and those freeze dried yogurt bites. Then last week I left him alone for like 2 minutes (he can’t really crawl yet, so I figured he couldn’t get far), and he got into the kitchen, found a bag of Cheetos, dumped them all over himself and went to town!

    March 26, 2015 at 11:09 am Reply
    • alesha_haley@yahoo.com

      BAHAHA Chocolate chips for dinner! Thats awesome! I work from home too, so I totally hear ya with the craziness some days!!

      March 26, 2015 at 11:16 am Reply

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